She Love’s My Automobile

 

My dear dear friend, Jeremy, visited the great nation of Texas (for the first time!) over the holidays, which I took as an opportunity to try out for the first time the “Joseph Roberts: This Is Houston, This Is My City, and This Is Why It’s Fabulous (And If You Disagree Then Get The Hell Out And Move To Dallas Already) Greater Metropolitan Tour Extravaganza!”*  In other words… experiences quintessentially Houston and Houston alone.

In reality it was merely an excuse to visit a myriad of locales around the city I for which I haven’t made the time, all wrapped up in the guise of “Southern Hospitality.” That’s the secret about us Southerners— we’re just as selfish as everyone else, it’s just harder to detect because of our accents lull you into a false sense of security.  Regardless, the first stop on our “Joseph Roberts: This is Houston, This is […] Tour Extravaganza!” was none other than longtime Houston institution …

The Art Car Museum!

 

The Art Car Museum, or “Garage Mahal” as many know it, opened in February 1998. […] The Museum has its conceptual origins in the 1984 Collision show curated by Ann Harithas at the Lawndale Art Center. Collision unveiled Larry Fuente’s “Mad Cad” art car which has since been featured in museums and cultural institutions across the country. The Collision exhibition provided enthusiastic fuel for the art car movement in Houston and eventually precipitated the Art Car Parade and the international Art Car movement. – Via the museum’s website

 

Due to the sheer number of art cars in the collection, the museum tends to rotate different specimens in and out of the museum gallery. As such, here are some of their most current pieces.

 

 

There’s even a Luke-sized option!!

 

For a real taste of what these things look like on the road, here’s a compilation of one of the more recent events:

 

Artist: Willie Nelson / Album: Live and Kickin’

You Have to Be Carefully Taught

 

My cousin, Hannah, came up yesterday to spend a couple of days in Houston over her Christmas break from Carnegie-Mellon and it has been a fantastic chance to hang out and chat more than we have in a long time.  At one point during the evening I posted the follow to my facebook and perhaps I should have worded my excitement in a different way:

 

The “Tolerance” statues in question are an installation along the Allan Parkway by artist Jaume Plensa that I have often seen while driving by but never had a chance to actually go and visit.  And as proof of my bad influence:

   

Me, Hannah and, as always, I keep one giant metal statue empty to represent our unfulfilled hopes and dreams…

… just kidding. My friend Zach was off having dinner with lesser people.

 

 

Artist: Richard Rogers and Oscar Hammerstein II / Album: South Pacific

Night in the City

Goooooood night sweet Houston!  By the time this posts I’ll be off into the great Blue (Lake) yonder.  The next ten days will be spent rehearsing and then it’s off to Europe for the tour!  I’ll miss you, fair city, but I’m sure you’ll survive without me.

Artist: Joni Mitchell/ Album: Song to a Seagull

Graduation Day

 

In the midst of getting ready (both mentally and musically) for Blue Lake this last weekend I completely forgot to post about my singing at the commencement ceremonies for the Houston campus of Texas Woman’s University last Sunday.  The event was held at the George R. Brown Convention Center and, though I’m sure I must have gone at some point in my childhood, I can’t actually recall doing anything but driving past the behemoth building since moving to Houston.

Get it, George!

 

One of the perks of being part of the podium posse is that you don’t have to gather with all of the riff raff commoners before the procession (aka the graduates).  I didn’t really take many pictures at the event but managed to snap one of the faculty ready room.

 

For those of you interested in the musical selections for the event, I sang the National Anthem (duh), the TWU Alma Mater (set to the tune of the Russian National Anthem), and a little ditty called “To The Texas Woman’s University.”  Whenever I first told Catherine I got the gig she immediately went: PUH-LEEAAAAASE tell me you’re going to be singing “Climb Every Mountain”?!?!?!?!?!?!?  Though the answer was obviously no, amazingly enough as I was driving home from the commencement I turned on the radio and I kid. you. not—it was playing on NPR.  What syzygy! So, because apparently Catherine needs a bit of a Rogers and Hammerstein II fix… I must oblige.

CLIMB IT, SHIRLEY!!!!!

 

I never particularly get over to this area of the city and it was nice to get a different vantage point of the downtown area from the convention center.

I LOVE THIS CITY!!!!

 

It really is hard to believe I’ve been out of school for a year already, and in the spirit of the day (and because I know I haven’t put one of these pictures up on the blog yet) here are some snapshots from my own college graduations!

Baylor University 2006     

 

     

  U of M 2008 (confession: I didn’t go to the ceremony)                                     U of M 2010  

 

Artist: Kanye West/ Album: The College Dropout

‘Zat You, Santa Claus?

 

This morning (8:45 to be exact.. wah wah) I joined the Bell/Yartym clan for breakfast with Santa at the Aquarium restaurant!!!!!!  I had to explain to my friends at work that yes, there were children involved and I wasn’t going to, you know, meet Santa personally or anything.  I missed out on last year’s festivities so was happy when Mallory invited me to come along!

 

  

 

This is actually Paige’s second breakfast with the jolly one, but according to Greg, Mallory’s dad, at least she was awake for the whole thing this time.

Paige (looking as adorable as ever) and her cousin, Reagan (who is clearly not impressed). 

 

Paige Yartym: apparently throwing gang signs starts at an early age. YOU HAD SO MUCH POTENTIAL!!

 

And just in case you thought that the restaurant was an aquarium in name only:

 

   

                           Is that David Sedaris in there?!?!                                    I’M STARTING TO WRINKLE!!!!!         

 

BUT THERE’S MORE! The Aquarium is more than just a restaurant… and an aquarium.  That’s right, folks, there are also carnival rides and Lady Paige was NOT getting away without a ride.  Some of you northerners may be thinking to yourself “But Joseph, it’s Winter!  Isn’t it too cold for outdoor joyification?”  And, of course, like most northerners, you would be WRONG!!!!  In true Texas fashion, Santa not only brought toys to all the boys and girls  but 70 degree weather as well.  TAKE THAT OZONE!

 

 

MERRY CHRISTMAS, Y’ALL!!!

 

Seeing as how the holidays can be a taaaaad stressful for basically everyone involved over the age of 7, and, seeing how this post just happens to be about an aquarium, here is a fascinating video of the second largest aquarium IN THE WORLD. (That last bit was supposed to be read as if David Attenborough were saying it).  So take a chill pill—that would be a Xanex for my waspy housewife readers—and relax already!

 

Artist: Louis Armstrong/ Album: Christmas Through the Years

Sophisticated Lady

Thursday’s here in Houston offer a great chance for art lovers to check out the Museum of Fine Arts for fuh-ree, and you all know how much I love a good deal. Or as my mother says: “A sale isn’t really worth it until it reaches 75% off,” so I think she’d approve.

I have some faint memory of visiting the museum when I was younger and am pretty sure it was when I was in 6th grade, my first year in the Crockett public school system.  I say that because I remember riding a bus, and that’s absolutely nooooo way to travel for a pampered private school student.  We would have either taken vans or had a mom-driven carpool going. 

I knew I was in for a fun day when I saw this car in the parking lot:

My father’s worst nightmare in vehicle form (mostly because there’s no 12th Man sticker amongst the fray. [mostly because hippies aren’t accepted to A&M] {unless the corps needed some extra shooting practice}])

So following are some of my favorites from the museum, though I wasn’t able to fully explore the exhibits because I had to meet Liz for the concert! I’ll admit that I was a horrrrrrible academic and didn’t write down many of the work’s names or artists.  We’ll just say I did so in order to make you visit the museum and find out for yourself.

Kees van Dongen: The Corn Poppy. Definitely my favorite! She has Mary Louise Parker doe eyes!

 

James Turrell: The Light Inside. Tuh-rippy

 

Ooooooh, so mysterious.  Who is this woman?  What about her warranted being painted? And more importantly, did she ever get a cramp from sitting in that position for so long?!?!  I must know!

 

I’m pretty sure I visited this town while on my European tour this summer.   Oops, gimme one sec while I pick that name I dropped off the floor.

 

This one I’m entitling: Vulgar and Blatant, by Georgia O’Keefe

 

This man might or might not be on faculty at U of M

 

A blown glass rebuttal to Ms. O’Keefe’s above painting

 

The “fuchsia-ist” bird hunt I’ve ever seen

 

 

Close up of a Charles Angrand’s The Harvesters.  Manual labor has never looked so vibrant!!

 

Who doesn’t like a dramatic still life?! You’re facing the wrong way poppy!!!!

 

Aaaaand finally: view of downtown from a museum window

Artist: Linda Ronstadt/ Album: Round Midnight with Nelson Riddle and his Orchestra